#thedertings

i have pondered this post for a whole year...i have started it and left it. but today being 8.16 i am hitting publish.... i have used this platform as reflection and healing for 12 years, so its only fitting this topic gets a place holder as well.  365 days ago it was my 40th birthday eve. brooks and i had just returned home from a b-day trip and i was nervous and apprehensive about going back to work on 8.16. i didnt realize it was going to change my family and life plan. every summer i dreaded going back because for years there were always changes, i was always on pins and needles wondering the last 1/2 of the summer what would change next. last year i pumped myself up and said i am not doing this. i am not worrying about this. it is what it is (thats my new 40 year old phrase, i use it often). but i was still oblivious to what could really happen...... so on monday i got up went to work in the pouring rain and had to deliver paper boxes of folders to several schools....i think i...