envy rots the bones
proverbs 14:30
lately, I have been bothered by entitlement and status that is taking over our world and most importantly our children...I guess because I am really trying to find peacefulness and contentment in living a minimalist life. yall know my dream is a tiny house on an island without THINGS....we have lived the life of living out of our means and it just kills me that people feel the need to keep up with the joneses. I want nice things for us and our kids especially (please don't think I don't), but I can not stop my thoughts of who really, really cares at the end of day....do you really remember what I wore last week? I barely do....and if you do, does it mean anything to my life or your life! dont get me wrong Bryson is happy to wear nike, UA, etc and brit loves some justice stuff....but heres a little secret, everything that has those "name" brands across the front of them came from tj maxx...we dont shop those stores unless its a great deal....so do you think less of me now?
at church last week (after I had most of this composed) the topic included:
-entitlement
-contentment
-envy
-happiness
****all words I had already typed......(imagine that)
it just makes me sad that this world today is so consumed in what others pay for things and what others have.....and why? why does it matter? what happens if my nike stuff came from tj maxx or goodwill for that matter. and lets be honest it goes beyond clothes....its shoes, cars....and then the heated topic of sports (just gonna leave that one alone)....
to the topic of cars....I was driving the loser cruiser for the past few weeks (the loser cruiser is our 2006 Honda Accord with 250k miles on it, its been rear ended/totaled, needs a new bumper, and Titus ate the trim pieces off the side the other day, so I was riding in high class for 2 weeks)....now dont get me wrong I cringed a few times driving it, but most of all I missed the safety features of my car and most importantly the backup camera.
but lets go back....why did I cringe....why do I care if someone sees me in a car missing the side piece from what is now the dogs chew toy....I cringe bc society teaches that! its not good enough, its not nice enough, its not new enough....thats not fair.....stop that....
I am not sure if its age or I am truly trying to live a minimalist life, but this just makes me want to scream who cares what you paid for _______....it is NOT important, it does NOT define your life! no one is going to say 10 years from now, gosh I cant believe she drove that......just stop and think about what we are doing to our kids! does it really matter if you spend $5 for something or $2500?? does that define you? or does that put you in debt?
I absolutely want quality in things, I absolutely want my kids to be happy, but happy is not defined by the latest and greatest of everything.....
I am certain people have a hard time seeing this point, because I have been there, I lived that way....I wanted new everything, all the time, I wanted to be able to say my kid has this or that, or I paid this or that for whatever......but my message and outlook have changed.....
I have been rereading this post for weeks, maybe because I am working hard at being #backtobasics.....but something kept me from posting.....and then there was Monday...
Monday we had a teacher workday.....we had an awesome speaker (at the Cove Church in Mooresville, thats meaningful, bc thats our church and if you know me at all, you know my quirks and my OCD-ness....I didnt get to sit in my spot, I didn't get to sit near the end even, I was in the middle.....aka anxiety).....BUT (back to the point), the training was on suicide....thats a tough one, its a word I dont care for....its a word that hit us very, very closely almost 2 years ago, when 2 weeks before Christmas Brooks found his brother had taken his life (I learned this is the political correct way of saying committed suicide).....this word----and this world we live in today-----they are connected, whether you can see it or not....they are!
this is a word I would have never written about a few years ago, this is a word that I didnt think would ever exist in my life, but I was wrong....we lived that word (suicide)...we asked why? we asked what did we miss? and we will never have answers, we will never know what happened that Tuesday evening/night....we will honestly never know if it had to do with things or medical issues or unhappiness or contentment....we will never know, but we do know that things dont matter...and that is a lesson that word taught us!
we have got to stop making others feel bad about what they have or dont have....we have got to stop judging others....(I AM VERY GULITY, in no way am I not)....our kids today....they have got to know that they mean more than things, they mean more than what they have or dont have....WE have got to teach them that!!! heck, we have got to teach ourselves that!
sorry this is super long, but gosh will I feel better after hitting publish!
***and for my own accountability records....I have run 4 miles this week so far---this is week 4!! #backtobasics in full swing!
much love,
alysha
