Happy Friday!!!
I don't have much time today, but I wanted to post about this touchy subject because for The Derting's the stress of the dumb end of year testing has now diminished...and before we drift back to normal.....I wanted to share.....
This has been a crazy, stressful week for many of us parents out there not to mention how our kids feel.....(an EOG is an end of grade test for 3rd-8th grades, an EOC is an end of course test for 9th-12th and now the good ol' state has added NC Finals for many courses 6th-12th)......all it truly means is STRESS, STRESS, STRESS..............
I know first hand from the teacher perspective how important "the test" is.....it says how "good" or "bad" you are as a teacher, your students scores measure the performance how good you have been teaching all year, right???....BUT this week I got the parent perspective as well.....Wednesday was the 1st day Bryson took his 1st ever EOG in Reading.....needless to say Tuesday night was difficult and Wednesday morning was worse.....tears were shed in fear of this piece of paper that he thought determined his fate F.O.R.E.V.E.R!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I often told my students......that I, Alysha Derting, FAILED...BIG FAT F.....3rd grade tests, 4th grade test, 5th grade tests....etc!!! I attended summer school in 3rd grade to "try" and increase my poor score.....and honestly all I remember was playing Oregon Trail on the computer most of the summer! I was not a strong student, I was not even a good student...I struggled ALWAYS.....failed geometry in HS, failed a spanish or 2 in college, failed college algebra.....twice! Y'all it took all I had to take a test and barely make a passing grade.....so Wednesday when my very own 9 year old.....cried in fear of going to school.....................I was FURIOUS! School is not the easiest for Bryson....he has pushed all year to work towards the highest reading group.....why? Because he had a goal to make it there....and last week he finally did!
I am so serious when I say.....SCHOOL IS HARD....THE TESTS ARE HARDER AND ITS JUST NOT FAIR! There is no reason why babies....3rd and up, should worry themselves sick over a dang test! I try to share my story whenever I get the opportunity......I failed 3rd grade and was graciously "passed" on because I attended summer school....BUT did that impact my whole life, NO, was I devastated that I could never pass college algebra, YES, BUT am I THANKFUL FOR each and every one of those challenges....ABSOLUTELY! If I had an easy road, I would not be doing what I do today, I would not have the personal aspect to share with others....that life is going to be okay, if you don't pass....the world will continue to turn no matter what the test score is!
So although I am over the moon that my boy just killed his first EOGs......I am sad for those sweet babies that face retakes of that awful ol' test....sad that they have to deal with it AGAIN!
All I can say is.....the test is one day, one day in a big lifetime of days, its a way to show what you know, but its not a way to destroy if what you know isnt shown!!!
Congratulations to everyone that was successful on the EOGs this week.....just smile and move on to those that were not as successful and remember.....tomorrow is a new day and when you are 33 that test you weren't successful on will not mean a thing!!!
Much Love,
***Praise your babies for each and everything....that can make or break them!
Alysha
Friday, May 29, 2015
Thursday, May 7, 2015
"keeping up with the ________" somewhat shifted to "bitter or better"
FINALLY, I feel like I have what I need to share this post....it has been brewing in my head for months, but every time I tried to put it into words, they wouldn't come out...
So often we find ourselves trying to "keep up with the __________" (others)...you fill in the blank....and often times if we feel like we don't have what someone else has we aren't good enough, or doing enough, or worthy enough.....and then that lust for whatever reason turns into resentment.....and over time that resentment turns into bitterness! **the definition of resentment is: feeling of bitterness!!
I have been wanting to write about how there are things others have that I want....but for whatever reason its not meant to be or meant for me to have because if we all have it all then this world wouldn't be unique....I am talking small stuff to big stuff...maybe a cute necklace to the pool I dream about in the backyard...I have wants and they are often things that others have....BUT when I really take a look at what I do have and what The Derting's have, there is truly nothing we NEED to make it through life....we have food, we have a house, we have clothes (probably too many), we have cars and gas for the cars, my kids have way more than they truly need b/c these things don't really matter....we try hard not to buy our kids toys, you know my motto: memories over things....if they want something THEY buy it!
While at church recently, I finally saw the purpose of my next post....it was eye opening...they called for any one that was broken or bitter to come forward and take a stone (I think, it was a stone), once the stone was taken the bitterness and brokenness then needed to be changed into BETTER!
We write our own stories, I can't write yours, you can't write mine, I can't write my kids, etc....it is US (YOU, ME) that live OUR lives. I couldn't believe the crowd of people that went forward openly confessing that they are bitter or broken and I am sure many had very valid reasons to be this way, but I hope that if they went forward because they are lusting over what others have, things that they want, the job they didn't get, the car they can't afford, the school they didn't get accepted to, wanting to be like others....they, TODAY, feel BETTER.....these things are just that, "things".....they may make you happy for a period of time, but that won't last forever....
As for the families: The Davis', The Johnshon's/Montogomery's, Little Teagan's family....I am broken for all of them.....it is heartbreaking to see so many in the very small community I live in dealing with such pain (daily), it isn't fair and it is especially not fair if you are in a bad mood and mad at life because you don't have some small petty object....and then I can't even imagine or take my mind to places like Baltimore or Napel.....there are devastating reasons why some are broken and bitter, but if you wake up in the morning mad and anger at the world because your friend on FB got a new car or someone is going on a trip that you wish you were or you don't have that new pocketbook that you have been wanting.....and you allow yourself to be bitter or broken because of it PLEASE, PLEASE rethink your bitterness before you get out of the bed...
My original thought was to share about "keeping up with the _________" and explain how hard Brooks and I try not to have the mindset of wanting to be like others...we strive to be the Derting's and whatever we have worked for and have attained is simply because we have worked for it and attained not because we want to be like others.....granted don't get me wrong when I say.....I STILL WANT A POOL, I still want a pool....would I like a nice fancy, fun car, YES...but is my day, my week, my month, my attitude ruined because there is something out there that I want that someone else has and I don't have it! NO!! I make today what it is.....I choose to be better! I choose to spread BETTER to others....we have issues, we all do and we all choose what we do with the issues.....we let them control us or we control and contain them!
I know there are so many out there hurting, so many that it is a physical and emotional challenge to even wake-up in the mornings, and it is hard to see why the unthinkable is happening and it doesn't seem fair, but the other reason for my post is if you have the ability (physically and emotionally) to get up in the mornings, then please don't take that for granted, don't let others make you bitter, don't let others control your life and emotions, its your choice: happiness and joy or bitterness and broken!
I feel like I am being way too hard in this post and I feel like some will see it for the wrong meaning....my goal is to bring a different perspective to others, IF one person decides to be better instead of bitter then it was worth it...
***I feel like I have shifted my main purpose of "keeping up with the _____" in this post into a bigger purpose, so maybe at some point there will be a continued version of "keeping up with the ____"....
Much Love,
I choose BETTER, Alysha
So often we find ourselves trying to "keep up with the __________" (others)...you fill in the blank....and often times if we feel like we don't have what someone else has we aren't good enough, or doing enough, or worthy enough.....and then that lust for whatever reason turns into resentment.....and over time that resentment turns into bitterness! **the definition of resentment is: feeling of bitterness!!
I have been wanting to write about how there are things others have that I want....but for whatever reason its not meant to be or meant for me to have because if we all have it all then this world wouldn't be unique....I am talking small stuff to big stuff...maybe a cute necklace to the pool I dream about in the backyard...I have wants and they are often things that others have....BUT when I really take a look at what I do have and what The Derting's have, there is truly nothing we NEED to make it through life....we have food, we have a house, we have clothes (probably too many), we have cars and gas for the cars, my kids have way more than they truly need b/c these things don't really matter....we try hard not to buy our kids toys, you know my motto: memories over things....if they want something THEY buy it!
While at church recently, I finally saw the purpose of my next post....it was eye opening...they called for any one that was broken or bitter to come forward and take a stone (I think, it was a stone), once the stone was taken the bitterness and brokenness then needed to be changed into BETTER!
We write our own stories, I can't write yours, you can't write mine, I can't write my kids, etc....it is US (YOU, ME) that live OUR lives. I couldn't believe the crowd of people that went forward openly confessing that they are bitter or broken and I am sure many had very valid reasons to be this way, but I hope that if they went forward because they are lusting over what others have, things that they want, the job they didn't get, the car they can't afford, the school they didn't get accepted to, wanting to be like others....they, TODAY, feel BETTER.....these things are just that, "things".....they may make you happy for a period of time, but that won't last forever....
As for the families: The Davis', The Johnshon's/Montogomery's, Little Teagan's family....I am broken for all of them.....it is heartbreaking to see so many in the very small community I live in dealing with such pain (daily), it isn't fair and it is especially not fair if you are in a bad mood and mad at life because you don't have some small petty object....and then I can't even imagine or take my mind to places like Baltimore or Napel.....there are devastating reasons why some are broken and bitter, but if you wake up in the morning mad and anger at the world because your friend on FB got a new car or someone is going on a trip that you wish you were or you don't have that new pocketbook that you have been wanting.....and you allow yourself to be bitter or broken because of it PLEASE, PLEASE rethink your bitterness before you get out of the bed...
My original thought was to share about "keeping up with the _________" and explain how hard Brooks and I try not to have the mindset of wanting to be like others...we strive to be the Derting's and whatever we have worked for and have attained is simply because we have worked for it and attained not because we want to be like others.....granted don't get me wrong when I say.....I STILL WANT A POOL, I still want a pool....would I like a nice fancy, fun car, YES...but is my day, my week, my month, my attitude ruined because there is something out there that I want that someone else has and I don't have it! NO!! I make today what it is.....I choose to be better! I choose to spread BETTER to others....we have issues, we all do and we all choose what we do with the issues.....we let them control us or we control and contain them!
I know there are so many out there hurting, so many that it is a physical and emotional challenge to even wake-up in the mornings, and it is hard to see why the unthinkable is happening and it doesn't seem fair, but the other reason for my post is if you have the ability (physically and emotionally) to get up in the mornings, then please don't take that for granted, don't let others make you bitter, don't let others control your life and emotions, its your choice: happiness and joy or bitterness and broken!
I feel like I am being way too hard in this post and I feel like some will see it for the wrong meaning....my goal is to bring a different perspective to others, IF one person decides to be better instead of bitter then it was worth it...
***I feel like I have shifted my main purpose of "keeping up with the _____" in this post into a bigger purpose, so maybe at some point there will be a continued version of "keeping up with the ____"....
Much Love,
I choose BETTER, Alysha
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